From time to time, when I feel the need to step away from the demands of everyday life, I pick up a paintbrush and paint. It is my space of freedom and relaxation. I enjoy exploring different painting techniques, experimenting with colors, and observing how each one is rich and unique in its own way. Art, in general, is an important part of my life, and I have managed to pass that love and passion on to my children. The moments we spend together in front of a canvas often teach us lessons that go far beyond art itself.
One such exploration of painting techniques introduced me to a fascinating concept in art: pentimento. Pentimento refers to the phenomenon in which traces of an earlier version of a painting gradually become visible over time beneath the surface layer. A detail that an artist once decided to cover with a new layer of paint eventually reappears due to aging and chemical processes. The word itself comes from the Italian pentirsi, meaning "to repent" or "to change one's mind." The artist changed direction, attempted to conceal an earlier idea or mistake, but the canvas chose to remember everything.
This phenomenon made me reflect deeply because it mirrors so many aspects of our lives. How often do we try to create our own pentimento - painting over older versions of ourselves, hoping they will never be seen again?
I was reminded of a woman I knew several years ago. She decided to completely transform her life. She lost more than 40 kilograms, became obsessed with exercise, woke up at 5 a.m. every day, and was already at the gym before sunrise. She even marked her new identity with meaningful tattoos that served as daily reminders of who she wanted to become. From the outside, she looks fantastic today. She achieved a goal that many would consider the ultimate success. Yet despite this dramatic physical transformation, the deep feeling she had been trying to escape - profound dissatisfaction with herself and her life, never truly disappeared. The change was rapid and radical, but it remained on the surface. What she never touched was her inner world. The same fears, doubts, and insecurities remained. And so, from time to time, her own pentimento emerges, the older version of herself hidden beneath the new image. She still seeks external validation to feel worthy. She still compares herself to others. In conversations, she often adopts a defensive, almost combative tone, as though protecting herself from a blow that has not yet been delivered. Deep down, she still struggles to believe that people do not intend to harm her. Her goal was empowerment. She strengthened her muscles, but her core remained unchanged.
I, too, have tried more than once to paint over parts of myself that I no longer wanted to see. We often believe that a new title, a new job, a new city, or a reinvented version of ourselves will erase the wounds of the past. But our inner layers do not disappear so easily. They remain beneath the surface, waiting to be acknowledged, understood, and ultimately accepted.
Yet pentimento is not something we encounter only in personal transformations. It appears just as clearly in organizations attempting to reinvent themselves. When a company decides to rebrand, reorganize, or transform its culture, leadership often reaches for "new brushes and new colors." Ambitious plans are introduced, modern policies are written, visual identities are refreshed, and even office furniture is replaced. Everything appears new and exciting. However, if people's mindset and way of thinking do not evolve alongside those changes, the system quickly begins to crack. People continue behaving exactly as they always have. Before long, old patterns start showing through the shiny new façade: poor communication, resistance to change, gossip, and unproductive habits. Culture will always overpower strategy when the foundations remain untouched.
But pentimento in painting, just as in life, does not necessarily represent a flaw or a mistake. When we consciously work on ourselves, or when leaders intentionally build organizational culture, it is important to recognize that we do not have to, and cannot, completely erase the past. If the foundations on which we were built were sound, if our history contains values that shaped us positively, those old traces do not diminish the new picture. On the contrary, they give it depth, texture, and authenticity.
Perhaps that is the true beauty of life, not hiding our old layers, but learning to live with them. Just like in the finest paintings, traces of who we once were do not ruin the final work; they make it complete. Because the most beautiful canvases are those that carry a story in every layer.
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